Noom Week 20

Weight Lost This Week: 0.6 lbs
Total Weight Lost: 16.8 lbs

This has been a strange week for me. I’m near the end of the “lessons” in Noom and they’re all getting very weird and don’t necessarily seem applicable to me. They’re all about experimentation and the idea that you’re not supposed to be on Noom forever, that you have to teach yourself how to do all of this so you’re just doing it and not relying on the crutch of Noom. Which I guess makes sense but I’m not quite there in my head.

I’m not feeling confident. I’ve had some struggles this week and I’m seeing myself slipping into some bad habits. Or at least not being as careful as I should be for someone who wants to lose another twenty pounds. I’m definitely using food and drink as a crutch and I need to start actually putting some of these lessons into place to move beyond that.

In my group on Noom some of the people are saying they are going to back to some of the previous lessons from when they first started. It seems like this is a common phenomenon: that people achieve a bit of success and then they start to fall back into old patterns. And I definitely don’t want to do that. I’m grateful for the weight I’ve lost and how much better I feel physically. I definitely don’t want to go back.

But I’m sad. My job situation is not what I’d hoped for after having taken a leap of faith into a new teaching position this year. I guess the “good” part of it is that it isn’t through any fault of my own; everyone agrees I’m effective and a good teacher, etc. It’s that the one year position I took wasn’t renewed and there aren’t any other openings. So I”m looking for a new job and I’m just sad this week taking all of those hopes and expectations and the blood, sweat and tears I put into doing a good job there and trying to forge a new path.

I should be grateful, I know. We are safe financially and the job was great experience which puts me in a better place to find another one. In my head I know this. In my heart I’m frustrated. I need to focus on the forward motion but I just can’t get past the unfairness of it all.

I need to find focus this week. Focus on healthy food and the improving weather. Focus on my family who are all doing so very well, healthy and secure. Focus on the good in my life, of which there is much. Focus, focus, focus and the rest will follow.

Noom Week 18 & 19

Weight Lost These Two Weeks: 0.6 lbs
Total Weight Lost: 16.2 lbs

Crazy busy two weeks. My eldest son’s wife went into labor a week before we expected her to last Friday. I spent four days down there helping with their other three kids and getting her settled back home. It was a cap to a hard week at work where it is becoming increasingly clear that my one year COVID job will not translate into another teaching position for me in the district. When I was hired, I made clear that was the one hesitancy I had: I was giving up a stable, relatively easy job for an uncertain future. I was assured over and over this year that I would have a place. But now, with budgetary issues and union technicalities, that seems to not be the case.

I spent that last few days prior to the birth feeling very sorry for myself. There was definitely drinking. I didn’t eat a bunch of junk, but I definitely was less careful with my choices. But then leaving town and being without a scale or even so much reliable “on program” food gave me a bit of a test with how well I am doing on the program.

I’m at the part of Noom where they are talking about becoming more independent of the program and learning how to “fly on your own” so to speak without the regular nudges. And I will say that for the most part, I can see that I’m able to see myself continuing on “this way” indefinitely. Yes, the losses are slow. But I can have the occasional down days or celebratory moments and still continue on an overall downward trend. The scale is reliably under 160 these days, where just a few weeks ago that seemed like a barrier I couldn’t cross.

I’m also at the stage where I’ve given up in the past. I think this weight where I am at is one of my set points. The last time I lost, on Fast Metabolism Diet, I was at the exact weight I am now when I “loosened up”. And eventually gave up. I am mindful of that, wanting to be sure that I continue on rather than just saying “this is enough”. Because it’s not. While I am certainly glad to be down as far as I am, I’m not satisfied.

Noom set my first goal for 10% of my body weight. I’m just there. I reset the goal this week for another ten pounds from here. That would put me at under 150, a place I haven’t been in ten years. I’d like to get there by the end of the summer. It’s doable if I just keep myself on track.

Noom Week 17

Weight Lost This Week: 0.8 lbs
Total Weight Lost: 15.6 lbs

The scale finally started to move downward this week. I was reliably under 160 most of the week. I even got within half a pound of my 10% goal but then of course the scale bounced back up. Slow, slow, slow. But at least I did see movement this week.

This week I really worked on trying to reduce portion sizes. I am noticing that I actually am feeling fuller on less food. I purposely have been trying to stop eating before I really feel full. Before I would have thought “that’s never going to fill me” or “that’s not enough”. But I have been noticing that sometimes if I just give it a minute, I actually do feel satisfied a few minutes later as my body processes what I took in. It’s been eye opening. And I think that is what has the scale moving this week, because I’m more mindful of it.

That being said, I do need to work on using food and drink as comfort. I got some bad news this week and the first thing I wanted to do was say to hell with everything and eat and drink. I certainly indulged in the second. It is the one area that I really need to keep chipping away at. I’m certainly drinking less since I started this journey, there’s no question about it. But I don’t really think twice about having a few drinks, where I would never dream of having a few cupcakes or more than one dessert or anything like that.

I signed up for a Triathlon yesterday, for August. I’m hoping by August to be down at least another 10-15 lbs, which would help increase my speed in every leg. I’m excited to think that I will do one again. This one is a new one for me, an ocean swim on the eastern CT coastline. I liked the date: it’s in August, so I won’t have to worry about school or anything. But the athletic events are really my “big picture” as Noom likes to say, so that’s a new motivation. Losing more weight will help in every aspect of getting ready for it.

For this week I want to keep working on food and drink choices and keep up the activity. Now that the weather is nicer and the days are longer I’m hoping to exercise at least five days. I’ve been able to swim at least one day a week for the last few weeks. The bike is tuned up and ready to start some rides as well. 🙂